Time to Talk

When people ask if I’ve run a marathon, I always say yes.

When people ask what my time is, I always change the subject, clam right up or just say it was brutal.

So when I received this little reminder in the mail the other day, I decided that it’s time that I actually talk about it.

I know I’ve told you before, but my race was crappy – literally.

I made a lot of mistakes with my nutrition in the weeks leading up to it, and also the night before.

I’m convinced that I’m not Celiac but I do have some sort of insensitivity that seems to come and go. I also have a lot of issues with a LONG LIST of foods that give me migraines but choose to ignore a few of them when I feel like it.

The thing is, I’m good for the most part in avoiding my migraine triggers, I have been since I was 12, but for some strange reason I just can’t cut gluten completely out of my life. Cookies and cakes are just far too delicious.

So most of the time, I suffer silently. My stomach gets very angry with me but I try not to let anyone know.

But when I chose to eat cookies and pasta in the 24 hours leading up to the marathon, my stomach decided to stick it to me during my race.

So after several portapotty breaks and me feeling defeated from 33-39k, I eventually finish my marathon, upright but not so much on the smiley side and in the time seen in black and white on the card above.

It’s not a time of which I am proud. I KNOW I can run faster, have fewer complications and be grinning from ear-to-ear at the finish line if I finally cut these things out. But can I?

Will I?

I’m going to have to because in May 2012, I’ll be running that marathon again.

And I won’t be receiving a card like that in the mail ever again.

Do you have foods that you have to avoid in order to stay healthy?
How do you say no?

A Good Question

Why do we do it?

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More than Words

Around the age of six, I decided that I wanted to be a writer when I grew up.

I remember loving every minute of creative writing time in class, having writing contests with my classmates and had a notebook and a pencil near me at all times.

Over the years, my career aspirations shifted from wanting to be a novelist to a journalist to a communicator, but the focus was always on the written word.

I’m a voracious reader, a sucker for a guy with an expansive vocabulary and cringe every time someone at work says “verbage.”

But I’ll also be the first to admit that my grammar, spelling and ability to write coherent copy has also declined in the last few years thanks to medication, laziness and age.

So given my love of language, you’d think that I could come up with a quick answer when prompted to describe herself, right? Sadly this is not the case. In fact, I find my own bio the hardest thing to write to this day.

The sad part of it all is that the first words that I want to use in describing myself can be seen as negative and only physically descriptive. I never think to highlight achievements or personality traits first – the things that actually make me unique and, well, me.

My identity and worth are more than the shell that carries me. Yes, I lament the size and shape of it constantly but I just don’t seem to be in the right head space in which to do anything about it right now. It’s great that I recognize that, but the great things about me shouldn’t be hidden beneath it. I need to focus more on the person that I am and what I put out there versus what people can see on the surface.

Clouds may hide the sun from us every now and again, but negative thoughts/words should never hide who you are from the world.

So I’ll not only focus on finding the right words to describe who I am every day, but living them out so that I don’t have to worry about painting an image of myself that pictures can easily capture.

Do you have a hard time describing yourself, especially in a positive way?
What words describe you?

 

 

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