3/11/11

The Dreaded “C” Word

With a headline like that, I bet a lot of you went straight towards the gutter. Am I right? If you did, I’m usually right there with you.

COOOOOOKIE MONSTER!
photo source
Then some of you may be singing the song all about baked goods by a stellar blue monster pictured at right. High fives on that one, my friends.
Others, I’m sure, started thinking about “commitment,” right? Something I’ve been pretty afraid of before, and still am. But you’d be wrong.

I’m talking about communication, something I’ve made a career out of but an area in which a lot of people seem to have problems.

Don’t get me wrong, I’ve been known to be afraid to tell people EXACTLY what’s on my mind, but when asked, I will tell you. Straight up. Others think that avoidance makes things go away.

Before you think this is some passive aggressive relationshippy type of post, it ain’t. Sorry to disappoint, folks. It’s more a case of noticing that people are struggling and not telling those who are in mentoring/leading positions for help or guidance.

Let’s take the new POINTS PLUS thing not working for a large proportion of Weight Watchers members (or at least that’s what I’m hearing). Are they asking their leader for help? Are they calling up the company? I can’t say that I know of many. Instead, we take to whining on message boards, blogs and twitter, and giving up altogether. Not really productive but it makes us feel better, myself included.
Then there are runners. You’re running in a group and someone asks if the pace is good, if you’re feeling alright or if we need to slow it down. Only positive things come out yet you know you’re not doing YOUR LSD pace and you’re not sure how much longer you can hold out.

Why are people afraid to look weak/make themselves look vulnerable/different from the rest? It’s ok to be different. It’s ok to speak up when something is wrong. It’s ok to find your own path to success.
Your goals aren’t necessarily unique, but your situation isn’t cookie cutter. There is no one-size-fits-all advice or plan but talking it out with someone can give you perspective, perhaps a new solution and reassurance that you’re not headed down the wrong path.

I know that talking with others in a similar situation to my own around weight loss has led me to cancel my monthly WW pass and to try out SparkPeople for awhile.

So talk it up. Find solutions.

You won’t get left behind if you find your own path. In fact, you could get there faster.

Have you ever been afraid to seek advice when you were stuck?
Whether it’s in your personal life, to do with exercise, weight loss, school, etc.?
How did you overcome that fear and get the advice you needed?

2 comments:

krissie said...

I love this. Because it took a long time for me to get to the point where I did open my mouth. Before I was able to admit that I could not run with Nathan because trying to keep up with him was making me dislike running. Before I could tell someone "really, I have to walk for a minute." Before I could recognize that something wasn't working for me and move on instead of getting frustrated that I wasn't getting the results everyone else was.

Good for you, friend. I wish I knew how I got to the "big mouth" point I am at now, but I don't know. I just did.

And even though I'm still recording P+ on the empty column in my calorie counter, I don't know how much longer I will. It's frustrating. I like full fat dairy. The points seem to add up faster than the calories do. But we'll see.

Chunky Monkey said...

I agree. It frustrated me when people complain but do not seek solutions. Regarding being afraid to seek help, for the first time in my life I feel lost and I really dont know who to seek out. I tell myself to just focus on my fitness and the pieces will come together. Thats all I feel I can control now...Dont get me wrong. My family is great but I cant talk to them about problems at work. They dont get it and the position I am in...well I cant really broadcast that I am unhappy. Anywho...fitness fitness fitness! Thats my solution.

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