6/27/07

le boeuf du jour

"now that you're thin you must have them lined up around the block" I have a few issues with this statement... 1. Who's to say I didn't have them lined up around the block before? I wasn't an unattractive girl when I was heavy, nor are most heavy girls. It's always about self-confidence and self-esteem. If you're not confident, care about yourself, put yourself out there, etc., people don't want to be with you. Pretty damn simple. I didn't have a problem attracting guys before and I don't now. I choose to be in the situation I am. 2. I didn't change the person I AM so why is that I should suddenly add a queue at my front door? Sad that we live in a superficial world but I pretty much the same person I was at 230, 205, 175 and 135. I run off my mouth when I want to, I'm a good listener when you need to let it all out and I will definitely tell you that dress does not flatter your figure or those shoes do not go with those pants. Why the sudden interest just because I lose a bit of weight? Someone went a little further when I prodded them on about that statement, because I'm outspoken when I want to be, ya know and maybe I egged him on....because he REALLY pissed me off... "well, I'm not saying you didn't get dates THEN, but maybe the type of guys you attract now are a different quality..." AHHHHHH....so now we're saying I can get the hotties where as before I could only get the big, stocky guys because that's what I was? Because likes attract? HOOOOOOOOOOOOEY, I SAY! I think most of the guys I've ever been with were medium to fit, were on the attractive side and I was always the unhealthy of the pair. I don't know where these generalizations crop up from but frankly, I was peeeeeeved. can ya tell I STILL am? Just because we've had extra meat on our bones, doesn't mean we're any less special, any less deserving of attention, love or affection or should be any further down on any list to be desired. Granted, everyone has their own preferences, but don't apply your ideals to the general public. Not everyone thinks the way you do or puts it in practice. Love who you want. Skinny, thick or in between. I could care less. Whatever makes you happy makes me happy. But don't sit there and say I'm going to be happier now and should be out there strutting my stuff and not keeping it all to myself. and this, ladies (and maybe a few gentleman), is why I'm still single.

11 comments:

Angie All The Way said...

OMG, I totally forgot I started a rant post on this subject a few months ago and it stayed draft! Can't believe I forgot to post it!

The statement that prompted me on my post was "Oh, you must feel so much better about yourself now and have a healthier self esteem." Um, ok, I'm posting my draft rant to follow with yours...

Sarah said...

AMEN!!!

I've always been bigger than the guy I've dated. I like skinny men... and they loved me just the way I was!

Sara said...

I'm bigger than my husband - if I get down to 135 then maybe I'll be thinner. He loved me at 184 just as much as he loves me now at 155 and am sure as much as if I lose more weight.

Good for you for speaking out! People like that drive me freaking insane!

jodi said...

i was usually bigger/heavier than the guys i dated as well and when i was finally with someone that was bigger, i felt strange... how ironic... i really like your post and thank-you for putting it out there - women, at any size, have the right to date who they want... if THEY are okay with how they look and the person they're dating is okay with how they look - let them be happy for god's sake... this "i'm too fat" or "he's too skinny for me" is a bunch of crap - i say go for it before you regret it later... :o)

Green Girl said...

I agree that it's all about self-esteem... People naturally gravitate towards other people that are confident in themselves (or so I've heard :P), not matter what the size. I have a couple of friends that are not at all skinny, but they are a joy to be around, and I see them as very attractive (as I'm sure other people do); and they have men in their lives that love them.

I think loosing weight gives my self-esteem a boost, but it really doesn't change me as a person (no matter how much I wish it would make me confident and outgoing... ha ha :)).

Mandy said...

YOU ROCK

Shrunk said...

Oh I totally agree. It is ridiculous to think that the good guys only like thin women. There are ALOT of men who prefer women with some meat on them. There are also alot of men (like my DH) who really do look at what's on the inside.

Buddy you were talkin' with sounds like a knob :OP

FHZ said...

Hey Marie,

"I didn't change the person I AM" accept my applause for this.

You are absolutely right about self esteem...I liked what you said..."just be yourself no need to change anything or for anyone"

FHZ.

Anonymous said...

In my opinion fat people, or ugly people, whether they are skinny or fat, tend to accept whatever love they can get... when you are fit or pretty you can be more choosy and attract more fit people good looking or not.

~paige~ said...

funny that the comment above should be anonymous. i too, would not want to put my name with such a ridiculous remark...
marie, sister, you rock.

marie said...

OBVIOUSLY anonymous didn't read everything i wrote...i didn't settle for "whatever i could get" - although whatever i got usually was better looking than i was, so thanks for reminding me!

everyone has an opinion though and thanks for your feedback. don't be afraid to leave your name next time though. we'd love to hear your story too :)

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